Best Friend

Di film Valentine’s Day (Warner Bros, 2010), si tokoh utama yang baru aja gagal bertunangan bertanya ke rekan sekerjanya.

“Hey, tell me something. How'd you and your wife get it so right?”
(Gimana sih caranya kamu dan istrimu bisa klop banget?)

“That`s easy. I married my best friend,” jawab si teman.
(Mudah saja. Itu karena aku menikahi teman baikku.)

Best friend. Itu keyword-nya.

Menurut ezine (http://ezinearticles.com/), setiap ahli/konsultan perkawinan, pasti memiliki daftar kriteria apa saja yang membentuk pernikahan yang sehat. Masing-masing biasanya memiliki kriteria yang berbeda. Namun, ada satu yang selalu muncul di daftar tersebut di setiap nasihat, artikel, dan kolom tentang pernikahan: true friendship. Cinta, sex, dll, tentu saja penting, tapi true friendship-lah yang dapat mengikat erat suatu pernikahan dan menjaganya bagai karang yang tahan ditempa gelombang cobaan.

Ada yang bilang “Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say.” Ketika seseorang tahu luar dalam tentang pasangannya: hal yang disukai/tidak disukai, harapan, cita-cita, kebiasaan, dll, itu artinya ia memang sobat karib sang pasangan. Dan itu lah yang aku rasakan dari istriku.

Dia tahu diriku luar dalam.
Dia mendengar apa yang terucap dan yang tak terucapkan,
seolah-olah bisa membaca pikiranku.
Dengannya, aku bisa berbagi perasaan gembira, sedih, atau marah.
Bersamanya aku bisa menjadi diriku sesungguhnya.
Tak perlu takut terlihat tidak mampu kalau memang tidak mampu.

Dirinya lah yang menyembuhkan perasaan terluka.
Yang tahu semua kelemahanku, tapi menunjukkan kekuatanku.
Merasakan ketakutanku, tapi menguatkan keyakinanku.
Mengenali ketidaberdayaanku, tapi mendorong kemampuanku.
She brings out the best in me!

Untuk istriku, Sisi, you are my best friend!

"You're the best friend that I ever had
I've been with you such a long time
You're my sunshine
and I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you

You're the first one
when things turn out bad
In rain or shine
you've stood by me girl
I'm happy at home
You're my best friend."

(taken from You’re My Best Friend, Queen, 1975).

Honey, I AM happy at home…
Happy 11th Anniversary

(c) created by MZ

Yin & Yang

In life, everything is created in dualities: e.g. matter and antimatter, female and male, etc. These dualities are called in Chinese as yin and yang.
Yin and yang are complementary opposites within a greater whole. One complements the other. Complement, as defined in Webster dictionary, means ‘complete, or makes perfect.’ So, without the existence of the other, the greater whole is not perfect. Without the existence of yin, there is no yang.
According to Wikipedia, yin yang has the following characteristics:
1. They are rooted together
Since yin and yang are created together, they are bound together as parts of a mutual whole.
2. They are balanced
Yin-yang is a dynamic equilibrium. Because they arise together they are always equally balanced.

Before I got married, my life was incomplete. My greater whole was not perfect. I needed someone to complement me. I needed my Yin. And then I married my wife. My life finally became complete.

The completeness turned into perfection since we are blessed with a lovely son and an adorable daughter. There were times in my life when I wished I was someone else who is more successful, richer, etc. But no, not anymore. My life is already perfect. I have a perfect family and thanks to my lovely wife for that.

My wife is the ultimate complementary of me. Many of my weaknesses are complemented by her. Every time I forgot where I put things, she can easily find them. When I forgot about an appointment, she will remind me of that. When I need more eyes when I drive a car, she would be my navigator. Together, we make a good team. I don’t know what my life would be without her.

My wife also brings my life into balance. I tend to throw away things that I think not worth keeping. She would remind me that the things are useful and that turns out to be true. I also have a tendency to be very calm, sometimes even too calm to notice a dangerous situation. If my kids got sick, I sometimes take for granted about the condition, thinking that it is only a minor sickness. She would enlighten me about the condition so I would be more aware of the situation.

Our dynamic equilibrium is also exist in our body temperature. When the room temperature gets colder, my skin becomes cool, while her skin becomes warm. It is vice versa when the room temperature gets hotter. So, no matter what the room temperature is, it is always comfortable to embrace her because she will balance my body temperature.

In addition to being a complementary of me and balancing my life, she is also an angel. ‘To err is human, to forgive divine,’ so they say. As a human, I make many mistakes, mistakes that I wish I didn’t do. But she wholeheartedly forgive my mistakes and give me chance to start over new. The angelic trust from her on me encourage myself to guard her trust. Hey, you wouldn’t hurt an angel twice, right? ?

In a nutshell, she is everything to me: my wife, my soul mate, my lover, my sister, my little girl, my navigator, my angel and my yin. She balances my life. She completes me. Together, we make a perfect mutual whole, because we are bound to be together.

To my wife, Sisi:

I am grateful for you, my love.
for how you complement me.
for all the ways you love me.
for the joy and pleasure you bring to my life.
for your patience when our lives are in bad times.
for your precious presence,
in memories of the past and this present moment.
For you, I am much more than grateful.
I am blessed to have you.

Happy Tenth Anniversary!

Truly yours,
Medio

(c) created by MZ

The Story Continues

Long distance relationship was the first test to our love, but we managed to conquer the challenge. No matter how difficult it was, in the end we were still together and finally united in Jakarta. No more phone calls in strange hours (we had 12 to 13 hours time difference), no more only imagining her presence. No more. Finally we could talk face to face, touching, embracing...

June 26, 1999, with the blessed from all of our family, we got married. Another chapter opened in our relationship. Another long journey ahead of us. But we knew, that when we are together, we could face even the hardest challenge. Because our love is our energy, and our God is our guide, that will illuminate every step we made toward the future.

July the following year, our first son was born. The champ was born! We named him A* R* Z*. 

November 2002, our beautiful princess was born. M* F* Z*. She was as beautiful as a beautiful flower. And she was born exactly in Ramadhan, the victorious month of moslem. That's why we named her F*.

Two children. One handsome boy and one beautiful girl. One, and only one, lovely wife. What a perfect world I have! Thank you, God! I've been blessed...

(c) created by MZ

Bandara - 1998

Mid 1996. I was about to leave for USA, to take my master's degree, leaving everything I love behind, including my love one, Sisi. Just before I left, I had written a short story for her about how we'd meet two years later, to show her that I would be back for her. And finally I was back, and she's still the one I want, then and forever.

Here's the story:


Bandara Soekarno-Hatta, Juli 1998

Matahari hampir terbenam ketika pesawat dengan nomor penerbangan GA 234 mulai menampakkan dirinya. Perlahan-lahan burung besi itu berputar di atas bandara, menunggu gilirannya untuk mendarat. Perjalanan selama lebih dari 20 jam dari Amerika itu benar-benar menguras tenaga penumpangnya. Wajah-wajah mereka menunjukkan kelelahan yang sangat.

Seorang dari mereka, pria muda berumur 27 tahun, memperhatikan kesibukan yang terjadi di bandara. Kepenatan yang dialaminya berubah menjadi kegairahan. Gairah untuk kembali ke negara asalnya yang ditinggalkan selama dua tahun untuk menuntut ilmu. Gairah untuk kembali menemui orang-orang yang dicintai dan juga mencintainya. Terbayang olehnya wajah-wajah mereka: Mama, Daddy, Aa’, Teteh, Mena’, dan Siska....

Sisi...Sisi...nama itu terus berputar di kepalanya. Nama yang selalu menemaninya di kala ia kesepian di negeri orang, yang selalu memberinya dorongan di kala ia patah semangat...Hampir tak tertahankan olehnya rasa kangen itu, meskipun akhirnya berhasil juga ia di sana. Selamat tinggal Virginia, selamat datang Jakarta....

**

Roda-roda pesawat itu menyentuh landasan dengan perlahan. Sesaat kemudian pesawat tersebut telah berada di Gate 5. ”This is your captain speaking. Welcome to Jakarta. We are very proud to fly you here. We hope will meet again next time. Thank you very much.”

Satu persatu penumpang itu berdiri dan mulai membuat antrian untuk keluar dari pesawat. Senyum dari para pramugari yang ramah mengantarkan mereka sampai pintu gerbang. Tetapi, bagi pria itu, hanya satu senyuman yang amat diharapkannya saat ini. Dengan sedikit tergesa-gesa ia berjalan. Degup jantung di dadanya mulai bertambah kencang. Aliran darah mengalir ke seluruh tubuhnya. Langkahnya semakin dipercepat. Sedikit jengkel ia ketika di depannya terdapat pintu imigrasi. Belum lagi antrian yang begitu panjang. Rasanya berabad-abad sebelum akhirnya ia sampai di urutan terdepan.

“Selamat malam, Pak. Apa anda membawa barang seharga lebih dari 1000 dollar? Apa anda membawa barang terlarang? Apa anda.....?” Dan sejuta pertanyaan lagi sebelum semua siksaan itu berakhir.

Ia melanjutkan langkahnya. Matanya mencari-cari. ”Di mana mereka?” Dan di sana, di kejauhan dilihatnya mereka. Mereka pun melihat pria ini. Dan orang-orang itupun menuju satu titik yang alan mempertemukan mereka kembali. Pandangan pria itu tidak lepas dari Sisi. Tidak sesaatpun ia rela mengedipkan matanya, takut kalau itu berarti ia harus kehilangan sepersekian detik tidak melihatnya.

Tak lama kemudian mereka bertemu. Peluk cium dari keluarga menyambutnya. Lalu...”Sisi...” Ingin sekali pria itu memeluknya, tapi beberapa pasang mata di situ membuat ia mengurungkan niatnya. Pandangan mata darinya sudah membuat lelaki itu bahagia, karena di sana ia melihat rasa sayang, rasa kangen....Digenggamnya tangan Sisi erat-erat, seakan takut akan berpisah lagi...

**

Di pelataran bandara mereka bertemu kembali. Mereka pun berjalan menuju mobil yang akan membawa mereka kembali ke rumah. Keluarga pria itu membiarkannya berjalan dengan Sisi di belakang. Sementara itu di belakang, dua orang yang saling mencintai berjalan bergandengan tangan...

”Si.., aku gak mau ada jarak lagi yang memisahkan kita. Kita harus selalu bersama. Always...”

TAMAT

(c) created by MZ